Two Terrible Ways to Shop for Home Decor From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

It was so cute in the store, so how come you don’t love it when you get it home?

Has that happened to you? You find what you think is the perfect vase, art, or rug, but once you get it home it’s clearly not right. You persevere and try it a few other places…still it’s all wrong. Then it ends up in a closet, in the donation box, or if you’re really on top of things you return it to the store. Then you try again.

It’s not you, it happens to everybody. It took me forever to figure out why it kept happening to me over and over again.

Turns out most of the time it had to do with how I was shopping. There are two ways of shopping in particular that led to my most regretful purchases; binge shopping and impulse shopping.

My cart was full and I was so proud of myself. I rushed home and neatly draped the raspberry colored bath towels against the chocolate brown walls. I hung the gold-framed artwork above the towel bar. I set the oblong leather box on the back of the toilet tank. It was the perfect size to hide three rolls of toilet paper. The finishing touch was the copper planter with gold handles. It looked perfect perched atop the wall cabinet. The finished bathroom was chocolate and raspberry perfection.

It was perfect…unless you knew me. I’m certain my family thought I had a fever and was delusional when I chose the color scheme. It was beautiful, opulent, and lovely. It just wasn’t me. I clung to a color scheme that caught my eye in a magazine. As I rolled my cart up and down the aisles of the home store, I grabbed everything I thought would look good in that magazine picture, not what I actually liked. At the time, I’m not even sure I knew what I liked.

A few short months later, I knew what I didn’t like. I was over the dark chocolate walls that felt like they were caving in on me. Dark red bath towels? What was I thinking? After drying them the first time, it looked like someone bled out on the lint tray in my dryer. Gilded frames, copper, and obscure leather boxes also quickly lost their charm.

All of it was nice stuff, but none of it was for me. I created a room around a color scheme I appreciated, not what I loved. In one fell swoop everything in that bathroom got the eviction notice.

Excerpt from Free Decorating

Binge shopping is particularly dangerous, because it’s code for settling. This is where you set out to find everything you want for a room in a single day or sometimes at a single store. Binge shoppers are usually well-prepared with a list of what they’re looking for, but they’re quick to compromise on what they love. They might…

• Order the stock fabric instead of the sample they really want to avoid waiting 6-8 weeks for delivery
• Grab accessories that they can “make work” even if they aren’t exactly what they envisioned
• Settle for whatever’s available, even if it means changing something drastic like the the room’s color scheme

I learned the hard way that instead of binge shopping I need to take my time because it saves me from having to redo an entire room. When I go shopping I use two lists; one is the shopping list of things I plan to buy that day, and the other is a wish list to record ideas and items I want to consider buying in the future. The second list helps me quiet the urge to get it all done at once. I know my plans will come together better with patience and holding out for what I really love.

One night after a long day with the kids, José told me to go out and take a break. I went shopping and bought a vase that had all the right colors, but was all the wrong style. And I bought it for all the wrong reasons. I was tired, sad, and crabby. I thought a vase could cheer me up. It was only $12. It made it one week on the mantel before I stashed it in the coat closet. José didn’t notice at first, but then one day he found it and pulled it out. He asked, “You don’t like this vase already?” It was that word “already” that was so incriminating. I’d never hidden anything from José before. He was pointing out how quickly I fell out of love with things, but the truth was I never loved it in the first place, which is why it wound up in the closet and later got donated.

Excerpt from Free Decorating

Impulse shopping is sneaky. It happens to the best of us. It’s the little purchases here and there that seem harmless, but if you’re not careful they add up to a lot of money spent for little value. Impulse shoppers…

• Go shopping without a list to see what catches their eye.
• Add things to their cart they weren’t planning to buy, because they’re easily seduced by amazing deals and big red sale signs.
• Take a second-lap around the store determined to find something, anything to buy.

Impulse shopping isn’t preplanned, it’s an “in the moment” weakness where you get momentarily blinded by cute, cheap, or convenient items. When was the last time you found something for 80% off, on the end cap, or in the check out lane that you truly loved or made your home? It can happen, but it’s rare.

I used to never go to the store with a list. Without a plan in place, I picked up whatever random things caught my eye. After a while of bringing home a bunch of things I only felt so-so about, I realized I was missing a huge opportunity to intentionally plan my decor, so I’d love it for years to come.

When I finally started paying attention to my impulse buys, I was embarrassed by how much money I wasted on things I didn’t love. Some of the purchases might have made me feel good in the moment, but made me feel horrible later. Staying out of the stores when there is nothing I need is my number one defense against impulse shopping. Number two is sticking to a shopping list. Anything else that catches my eye goes on the wish list, not in my shopping cart.

Are you guilty of binge or impulse shopping? It’s okay if you are, but there is another way. So how do you stop buying the wrong things and find decor you love? I wrote a book on it. To find home decor with true staying power in my home, I:

• Focus on what I love, not what I like in passing.
• Use “The Pre-Purchase Test” in-store to make sure I love it before I buy it.
• Shop my own home before heading to the store.

I cover all that and more in Free Decorating. Along with the book you get a bunch of online bonus resources including printable reminder cards to take with you shopping which will help you run through The Pre-Purchase Test and remind you it’s okay to leave the store empty-handed if you don’t find something you love.

Who Else Wants to Go Paperless? [VIDEO] From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

A paperless home has been on my wish list for a long time. I hate paper clutter and I hate managing paper.

But I also never took the time to devise a paperless system. Researching scanners and creating a digital filing system did not interest me. Thankfully there are people like Donnie Lawson to figure these things out and make them easy.

Donnie and his wife Abby, from Just a Girl and Her Blog, co-authered the ebook The Paperless Home*. If you want to rid your life of paper clutter, this is the guide you need.

Donnie and Abby were so sweet to sit down with me to talk all about their paperless lifestyle. In this video, you’ll learn:

• The biggest benefits of going paperless (from his and hers perspective)
• Where to get started on your paperless journey
• An alternative to an expensive scanner so you can start going paperless right away
• How much time it takes to maintain a paperless lifestyle
• And more!

Video not loading? Click here to watch.

Convinced? I am and I started going paperless while I was still reading The Paperless Home*. This guide holds your hand through the entire process, including:

• How to decide what papers to keep, toss, and scan
• How to choose a scanner
• How to use Evernote to create a digital filing cabinet (plus ways to keep your info secure and backed up)
• And Donnie’s entire end to end workflow for living paperless.

If you’re nervous about the technical aspects of going paperless, especially learning new software, have no fear because Donnie and Abby created an ebook + video package that includes 17 video tutorials teaching you step by step how to use Evernote. I’ve been an Evernote use for years, but I learned new tips and tricks in these tutorials.

Going paperless is a transition process, but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Donnie and Abby are approaching the five year mark living paperless so they’ve tried it all and figured out a system that works.

Start going paperless today with The Paperless Home*. I highly recommend making the tiny splurge to upgrade to the video package.

*Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. I may receive a commission on purchases made after following an affiliate link. I only share products I’ve used myself and love.

How to Quickly Update an Ugly Accent Table From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

This is my season of playing catch-up around the house. We are in the middle of one bigger secret project (more on that soon, promise), but during the in-between times on that project I am tackling all the tiny projects I’ve wanted to do for ages, but haven’t gotten around to yet. The funny thing is most of the projects I’m finally doing only take 30 minutes or less. Simple with big impact.

First up is a long overdue accent table makeover. When I bought this little table I was drawn to the ogee patterned base and the petite go-anywhere size, but I’ll admit I was not a fan of the black finish. I always knew I would change the color. This little table has floated all around our house, but we love it best in the living room. In this room we don’t have a lot of bulky case good furniture, preferring to keep the space open and light. Plus with a super long sofa we don’t have space for larger end tables. This little table is perfect tucked at the end of our long sofa.

It finally got the makeover it deserves. Step one was to coat the base with my favorite gold spray paint. Bye-bye black. If you’ve been reading for while, then I am guessing you already know how I feel about black. I do not subscribe to the myth that every room needs a touch of black.

I planned to spray the top gold too, it looked horrible. It’s hard to get an even finish with spray paint on a large flat surface. So I went to plan B: cover the top in something to contrast the gold base. I considered painting the top white or covering it with wood veneer, but I craved some pattern. So step two was to cover the top in a pretty pattern.

Turns out I had the perfect sized scrap of my favorite fabric, Cloud Gazebo, to cover the table top. I decided to keep this project as simple as possible. I simply stapled the fabric on the underside of the tabletop. I used lots of staples while pulling the fabric tight to avoid the fabric puckering around the round edge. Before reattaching the base, I finished off the underside of the table with decorative masking tape to hold down the raw edges of the fabric. If I ever want to change the look of the table again, the cover is completely removable and replaceable.

I adore the fabric texture and the large scale floral pattern next to the gold ogee base. This once black eyesore in our otherwise light and bright living room is now a pretty little gem and delightful surprise when you take the seat closest to the window.

Now to find a replacement plant for the corner. That gorgeous guy stealing the show up there happens to be toxic to dogs. I found that out after we brought it home. Our dogs didn’t bother with the plant, but I don’t want to risk it. So I am on the hunt for an attractive, large plant that isn’t toxic to dogs. Something the same size and with as much personality as the corn plant had. If you have any suggestions, please share them in the comments below.

My Secret Weapon that Picks Up More Dog Hair From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

Dog hair is the bane of my existence. We love our pups, but the fur they shed is no joke. Thank goodness they are cute.

Sofia is a ten-year old border collie sheltie mix. She has fluffy white and black hair with a black undercoat. Her hair coats my light beige carpet in a gray film. She leaves giant fluff balls everywhere she goes.

Ryder is a one-year old border collie, lab, husky mix. We kind of thought we won the lottery with him, because he has a gorgeous short, smooth coat. We figured that must be better than Sofia’s rough coat. It seemed to be the first few months. But now that he’s a big boy over 5o pounds, he sheds just as much. Turns out his undercoat is light gray. He leaves wirey gray hairs all over my dark wood floors. They just float around forming tumble weeds.

I can’t win.

We survive mostly with a *Dyson Animal vacuum that I use on the wood floors and the carpet. Unfortunately, the brush head stopped working last week, which means it doesn’t pick up anything from the carpet. Boo! Thankfully it’s under warranty, so while we get that fixed I’ll rely on my secret dog hair weapon.

Before we listed our last house for sale we had the carpets professionally cleaned. I marveled at how amazingly hair-free they got the carpet before cleaning them. They showed me the tool they used and I bought one from them on the spot. It’s a carpet rake and it works like magic to effortlessly pull up ALL the dog hair. This is a similar, less industrial looking *carpet rake.

If you’re allergic to dogs you may want to avert your eyes. The sight of this just might make you sneeze. Just look at the fur the rake picked up.The real secret to making the carpet rake work its magic is a spray bottle. Before raking, spray a section of carpet with water. In a pinch or if your spray bottle stops working, you can run the rubber part of the rake head under water. Keep it damp to pick up the most hair.

What I love most about the carpet rake is while it grabs out all the dog hair, it also fluffs up the carpet. We have cheap, builder-grade carpet that mats down easily. The vacuum just goes right over it not making much of a difference. The carpet rake makes every fiber stand on end for instantly new-looking carpet.

I am not exaggerating here. Just to show you, I didn’t vacuum or rake for the last two weeks. (Really I did it all for you, not because I was off playing with the kids at the pool all week. In my defense, the vacuum isn’t working.) Look how it pulls out two weeks of fur build up and makes the carpet look new again.

My favorite place to use the rake is on the stairs. It’s so much easier to maneuver than the vacuum and easy to flip over to get the vertical carpet on the risers. Plus, don’t forget the added benefit of fluffing up the carpet fibers, which always look the worst on the high-traffic stairs.

I’ve mentioned before that if I could only pick one chore to do before company came over it’d be to vacuum. Carpet raking comes in a close second. The vacuum (when it’s working) only wins out because it does the hardwood floors too. In an ideal world, I’d do both every single week and before guests come over.

Last week I had the honor of interviewing Becky of CleanMama.net (watch the full interview here) and naturally the dog hair dilemma came up. For vertical surfaces she recommended a giant lint roller. I also shared how I use a dryer sheet to grab up the pet hair and dust from our upholstered headboard. So my pet hair arsenal includes the Dyson animal, carpet rake, giant lint roller, and dryer sheets. What am I missing? Share your favorite pet hair removal tricks in the comments below.

*This post contains affiliate links denoted with an asterisk. I may receive a small commission on purchases made after following an affiliate link.

When You Crave a Clean Home But Can’t Get Started From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

I never felt my home was clean enough to have a cleaning routine. I know that sounds backwards, but I didn’t know how to get started. I thought I had to get it all clean first, like immaculate, then I would start a routine. I realize that’s like waiting until New Year’s to start eating healthy, but I couldn’t shake this feeling that I needed to do a big cleaning marathon or hire a cleaning service before I could start cleaning regularly.

Then I stumbled on Becky’s CleanMama instagram feed. Her simple daily reminders invited me to clean with a gentle nudge and no judgement. I started doing the weekly chores Becky recommended, like floor washing, dusting, or washing sheets and towels. Before I knew it my home was cleaner. Doing the weekly task often led to tackling other tasks while I was at it.

Slowly I was able to add in the four daily tasks. That’s when I started experimenting with mixing work and cleaning into one super-productive day. All of a sudden I was following, and enjoying, a cleaning routine. Turns out the best way to start a cleaning routine isn’t with a clean house, it’s by actually cleaning.

Last week I interviewed Becky for School of Decorating. My house felt cleaner just talking about cleaning with Becky. She’s so friendly and encouraging. She’s done it all from cleaning as a single working woman to stay-at-home mom to work-at-home mom and her cleaning routine has survived it all. You can learn all her amazing cleaning tips at CleanMama.net.

Every month I share a new expert interview for School of Decorating members. This month I’d like to invite you to join us for Becky’s interview. You can watch the entire interview for free here.

Psst…School of Decorating admissions will be opening again soon. Sign up at the bottom of this page to learn more.

 

How to Make a Bread-less Lunch Your Kids will Beg for this Summer From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

When I read the camp schedule my eyes fixated on the two snack times and lunch time. I had been looking forward to a break from making bag lunches all school year. Making snacks and lunches for summer camps never crossed my mind. Camp started the next day…what in the world was I going to feed him all week?

Sandwiches are the obvious lunch idea, because they’re easy and affordable, but…

My son is on a gluten-free, limited dairy diet. We don’t even keep bread or noodles in our house.

Making healthy lunches for kids is hard in general. Making a healthy lunch along with enough healthy snacks to fuel him through eight hour days at Circus Camp is harder. He would essentially be working out all day long…climbing ropes, jumping on trampolines, and doing acrobatics. I got hungry just thinking about it.

I was so worried about what I was going to send for him to eat. During the school year I made liberal use of a food thermos to send gluten-free chicken nuggets, mini corndogs, and fish sticks. None of those hot foods seemed appropriate for summer camps. So, I headed off to the store looking for “cold” healthy lunch options.

I realized while I was shopping I couldn’t possibly be the only mom stressing about healthy lunch and snack items. When I go to the grocery store, I skip past about five aisles full of bread, cereal, and chips making my way to the small pockets of healthier options throughout the store. If you’re struggling to find healthier options and ideas for your kids, I hope you find at least one idea in the list below that your kids will love.

Below is the list of foods I came up with for his first summer camp under the big top. This is what my seven-year old son ate most of the week. There was enough variety and volume of food to keep him well fed for two snack times and lunch time. I did not separate snack foods from lunch foods, but rather packed it all together. He chose one or two items to eat during his morning snack, then ate most of the rest during lunch, setting aside one or two items for his afternoon snack.

• Fruits: grapes, blueberries, strawberries, blackberries, raspberries, bananas, and apples. I picked three different fruits each day mixing it up throughout the week. One day he had the coolest banana ever (of course, as the nerd mom that I am I took a picture). It’s a twin banana…two bananas in one peel. That baby would have made an awesome banana split.
• Vegetables: Carrots, snap peas, mini sweet peppers (sliced into rings, bell peppers also work well). The number of fresh vegetables my son will eat raw isn’t much, so we repeated these same options more throughout the week.
• Entrée: Applegate Farms genoa salami and american cheese with multi-seed gluten-free brown rice crackers (not pictured). I always felt like the entrée had to be something really special, like the capstone of the meal, but I’ve discovered my kids love “snacking” more than a big, hard to hold sandwich or anything requiring a utensil. My son loves his finger foods, so he loves these make your own cracker “sandwiches”. The crackers are also good with almond butter.
• Extra Protein: Hard-boiled eggs. My husband regularly makes a batch of hard-boiled eggs on Sunday to snack on throughout the week. He puts the eggs in a mini muffin tin and bakes them in the oven (at 350 degrees for 30 minutes). Then we store them in the fridge in the same mini muffin tin. I peeled two each morning for my son’s lunch bag.
• Dessert: “Cookie Cakes” – This is our paleo chocolate chunk cookie recipe made into bars for easy portioning. They turn out a bit fluffier in bar form, so the kids call them cookie cakes. Early on in my son’s school career he used to come home asking me to get desserts for his lunch, because all the other kids had desserts. He saw kids eating everything from mini donuts to pop-tarts for their snacks. Of course he wanted a treat too. I’ve found including a yummy, but healthy dessert in his lunch keeps him satisfied and he’s stopped looking at what other kids are eating.
• Other snacks we love: Avocado, watermelon, mandarin oranges, plain greek yogurt with chia seeds, homemade kale chips, homemade roasted almonds with rosemary and sea salt, cashew milk with this homemade chocolate syrup, nut butters for dipping fruit and veggies (almond butter, hazelnut butter, and sunflower seed butter), our paleo banana bread recipe, and gluten-free marshmallows.

My kid would never eat that!

I know you might be thinking your kid will never eat that. I used to think that too. Or you think I’m lucky that my kids aren’t picky eaters. I assure you that is not true. My kids are also “picky” about certain things. One likes peppers the other doesn’t. They both used to hate spaghetti squash, but recently my oldest gave it another try and loves it.

The truth is kids like a surprising number of foods when they have the opportunity to try a variety to figure out what they like. They won’t like everything, but you never know until you try. Broccoli and peas make me sick to my stomach, but my boys love them cooked, raw, any way they can get them.

How we foster healthy eating habits:

• We eat every meal possible together seated at the table. Meal time is very important to us.
• We started promoting healthy eating very early for our children when we found out our oldest was allergic to milk at a year old.
• We’ve always opted for low or no-sugar, non-processed foods, and in the past couple years we’ve gone gluten-free as a family. We try to mirror their diet in terms of the types of foods they eat after our own as much as possible. That means if we’re eating steak and veggies for dinner, we serve the kids steak and veggies. If they don’t like what we are having for dinner, we make an alternate healthy option for them. We used to make them Annie’s organic, gluten-free mac and cheese quite often, but once we went totally gluten-free and stopped eating most breads and grains, the boys slowly grew out of craving mac and cheese. I don’t think I’ve made it more than a handful of times in the past year.
• We talk about why healthy foods are important and what bad foods can do to our bodies. Our boys have four aging grandparents, so they’ve have heard about heart problems, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc. We do our best to answer questions about those conditions and we tell them healthy foods can help prevent or delay the onset of those diseases.
• We never make them feel bad for trying and not liking a new food. If they don’t like something that is okay, at least they tried. We want them to always be curious and try new foods. We always let them try things off our plates at restaurants, which is how we discovered Jax loves lettuce…especially the big leaves from a wedge salad.
• Sometimes I make a special presentation to encourage tasting new things. Try placing bite-sized pieces in muffin cups or put them on a skewer to make fruit or veggie kabobs.
• We buy them anything healthy they ask for. I get the strangest looks sometimes in the grocery store when my boys quietly pass through the bakery section, but then explode into pleas for bell peppers and blackberries when we get to the produce.
• Although we don’t fault them for not liking something new they tried, we do insist they eat a full meal of the foods we already know they like. We hold back on cookie cakes until the dinner plates are clean.

One week down, twelve to go. I’m glad I nailed the summer food plan early on, because we have more camps coming up and these ideas will also be perfect for picnics and long hikes.

So what is your go-to healthy summer snack for your kids? Share in the comments below. I look forward to adding some more ideas to our grocery list.

 

Finally…a Bed Fit for a Prince From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

I think I just made an instant heirloom that I’m never going to want to let go of. But this project was anything but a fairytale.

I bought this antique oak headboard and footboard before I quit DIY. At the time I was looking for a bed option to upgrade Jax from a crib/toddler bed to a real big boy bed. I was so smitten with the curved footboard at the thrift store that I completely looked past the fact the bed had no bed rails. I figured how hard could that be? Other people are building beds from scratch. Some rails and slats can’t be that hard.

That’s when it happened…the first stage of DIY procrastination set in hard.

Three Stages of DIY Procrastination

1. Decision paralysis – putting off decisions and finding excuses not to move forward.
2. Lament and self-loathing – considering giving up before you even start while wondering at the same time, “will I ever get this done?”
3. Failing Forward – pushing ahead while cursing under your breath the whole way.

I know some of you probably love DIY and building your own furniture. I love the idea of it. This bed became a painful reminder of why I gave up DIY. I am super happy with the end result, but not proud of how I got there or how long it took.

So, this cool bed with the curved footboard has been hiding away in the basement for over a year. Last year I got gung-ho for like a day. I sanded and primed the bed to get ready for paint. But I stalled on painting it, because I wanted to build the bedrails first, which would also need to be painted.

Indecision set in about how to best make the bedrails. After a few weeks of staring at the bed and making no progress, I opted for the “out of sight out of mind” approach. The bed went back into storage. Thank goodness at this point my son (who was four years old) was still short enough to sleep on his crib/toddler bed. I didn’t feel too bad, because he loved his toddler bed and as a super wiggly sleeper he still needed the toddler rail.

Then his fifth birthday crept up on me. I wondered, how bad of a mother am I if he is still sleeping in a crib at age five? His birthday became the motivator to drag the bed out of storage, pull up my big girl panties, and make some bed rails.

One little problem…in all this time I didn’t even order a mattress. Ugh. One of the best ways to procrastinate some more is indecision. Should I get him a foam mattress or spring? Order online or go somewhere local? Decisions, decisions.

Motivated to give him a bed for his birthday, I stopped procrastinating and decided I didn’t need to make a decision. There’s this thing called the internet that can help make decisions easier, in particular a site called Amazon. Within 15 minutes, I ordered a well-reviewed twin mattress* on Amazon and had it shipped for free since we’re prime members. Now I really had to get cracking on those bed rails…

With mattress dimensions in hand, I measured, cut, screwed, and finally I had passable bed rails. For anyone hoping I would share details on the bedrails, I am sorry to disappoint you. I am not an expert and won’t pretend I made the best solution. I would check out the bed plans on Ana White’s site if you need to make a bed or bed rails.

Finally I had all the pieces together and slapped on two coats of my favorite paint color Enamelware (from the late great Martha Stewart paints from Home Depot). I honestly wasn’t that precious about my paint job. I figure this bed is going to get a little banged up, so I just made sure I had leftover touch up paint.

The curved footboard is so cool, but I thought the bed needed a little extra something. Obviously, I like to overcomplicate everything (one of the reasons DIY is not a great hobby for me). Instead of procrastinating some more, I took a trip to the craft store to look for wood embellishments. I didn’t find much, but brought home a few options to try.

Nothing “off the shelf” was clicking and I couldn’t decide, so I turned to the community inside School of Decorating for advice. Several members got Jax’s room mixed up with my older son’s room which has the shield gallery wall. It was a happy mix up, because the result was several inspired ideas to add a shield plaque to the bed. I loved it.

Of course, I couldn’t find a wood shield I liked anywhere. The ones I used for the shield gallery were almost an inch thick and seemed to stick out too far on the footboard. Then one day my kids left a foam play shield laying near the bed. I loved the shape and it was pretty close to the right size. I traced the shield onto scrap 1/4” plywood and cut it out with my jigsaw. Then I made a second smaller shield to layer on top. Finally I added the wooden letter H from the craft store.

A lot of wood glue and a few more coats of paint later and I had turned this scratched, abandoned, bedrail-less antique bed into a modern heirloom. I couldn’t think of a better bed for my little prince. (Note to self: Next time I would prefer a bed that comes with the bedrails, so I can skip the DIY part and just do the painting.)

Well, Jax didn’t exactly have a bed for his birthday. He got a mattress on the floor. Which he rolled off of a few times, so I’m pretending the few weeks his mattress was on the floor were intentional practice nights to get him ready for a big boy bed. Before he turned five years and one month old, he had a big boy bed.

The change was bittersweet for all of us. I don’t think any of us were entirely prepared to let the crib go. Jax is my baby and the last one for us. When we moved into this house he was only one-month old and his nursery was the first room we pulled together. We loved it so much it hasn’t changed much since and other than the new bed and blackout curtains, pretty much everything else will stay the same. Here’s quick trip down memory lane…

Back to the present…After what seems like forever (I mean it took over a fifth of my little guy’s life to get this bed together), I got to do the fun stuff, like pick out new bedding. We don’t have any other twin-size beds in the house so this was a fun excuse to buy new sheets and a blanket. Neither of my boys like comforters or duvets, preferring instead to sleep under lightweight blankets. No complaints here, since a blanket is far cheaper, easier to clean, and I found one with a fun pattern.

I always envisioned this light turquoise bed against his dark teal walls with lots of graphic pattern. I opted for sheets with a turquoise circular pattern, an extra pillowcase in a tiny yellow stripe and a soft blanket in a funky gray herringbone pattern (all from Target). I love how the graphic patterns complement the vintage curves of the bed and keep it from looking too girl-y.

Jax sneaks off to play in his room more now :) I am glad I survived the three stages of DIY procrastination to see him enjoying his “new” old bed.

*Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. I may receive a commission on purchases made after following an affiliate link.

What To Do When Everything Seems Impossibly Hard From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

I was having one of those weekends. Everything went sideways and that was before a family emergency resulting in my husband flying out of town on a moments notice. This past weekend everything felt impossible.

It started when I woke up on the wrong side of the bed Saturday morning. After a long, rainy week I was looking forward to a relaxing sunny weekend. I was still surprisingly optimistic as I cursed under my breath when I stepped on action figures laying next to my bed. But everything kept going wrong. I dropped a stick of butter on the floor trying to make breakfast…so gross.

After running the kids around to activities all day we were packing the car with blankets and snacks to go to a drive-in movie and everyone was excited. Then the weekend halted to a sudden stop. My husband flew out early the next morning.

I barely mustered the strength to shower yesterday, let alone do anything around the house. And of course my to-do list for the weekend was a bit bigger than it should have been:

• Power wash the deck
• Get new bedding for my sons big boy bed
• Hang a gallery wall in my husband’s neglected office

In my defense, I thought this wasn’t too much for a weekend. It’s not like I actually expected to stain the deck. I was just hoping for progress.

Of course I had a slew of work tasks I was hoping to spend some time on too…

• Manuscript for my next book
• Edit and upload videos for a new School of Decorating class
• Write a blog post (hey, looks like I’m accomplishing that)

As of the end of the day Monday, the only thing I accomplished is the post you’re reading now. And at first I beat myself up about the rest.

Even after driving my husband to the airport before sunrise and having one kid puke in the car on the way, I was still trying to plot out how to do everything. It’s a sickness. I thought…I could I figure out how to use the new power washer and clean the deck while the kids played outside. Maybe I could plan out the gallery wall after I get the kids  to bed and then hang it in the morning after they go to school. I can stay up late and work after they go to sleep, because my hubby isn’t here to binge-watch Mad Men with anyway.

Of course I could have done all of that, but I shouldn’t have even been thinking about doing any of it. Sometimes you have to let a plan go.

What the heck was I thinking? This isn’t the time to be superwoman, it’s time to give myself grace. I am so bad at that. I push myself too hard all the time.

I’m working on it…with lots of reminders from my husband to take it easy. So when everything went haywire this weekend and I finally came out of the haze, I resolved to do almost nothing…except love on my little guys and take care of myself.

When everything feels impossibly hard, I do these five things (in no particular order, but I usually start with the shower to symbolically wash away the stress):

1. Take a Shower

I know a bath sounds more luxurious, but sometimes that’s just too much work. Keep it simple. I was going for quick wins and clean hair. A quiet shower did wonders to quiet my mind.

2. Buddhify

Even if you don’t meditate, you’ll love this app. It’s my favorite. Buddhify is an iPhone app with short (most under 10-15 minutes), easy meditations that anyone can do. My husband and I often listen to a “Going to Sleep” meditation before bed (my favorite is “Whole”). But there are meditations for every life event, including categories for “Feeling Stressed” and “Difficult Emotions.” I listened to several of them over the last two days.

3. Do Something Stupid Easy

When I feel like I can’t get anything done, the best thing I can do is grab for the low-hanging fruit. I resort to simple tasks that I know for certain I can accomplish, like loading the dishwasher. It’s not much but every little triumph helps. And a clean sink has a magical effect of making the whole house feel cleaner, even if it’s not.

4. Avoid Stress Triggers

This one is so important for me. When I think I can do it all, I often end up putting myself in bad situations where my anxiety or stress goes through the roof. By paying more attention, I can avoid the triggers that make everything worse.

A big one for me is technology. If I am already anxious or stressed, being behind a computer is the last place I should be. I am also not that great behind a steering wheel. So this weekend I limited my technology use to hitting the play button on my new theme song, Fight Song by Rachel Platten. And I took the boys to go see Tomorrowland.

5. Read a Nice Book and Go to Bed Early

On my nightstand now:
The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, Living Well Spending Less, Free Decorating, Love the Home You Have

Nope, I didn’t stay up late working. I listened to my body. After getting up at 4am to go to the airport, then chasing two boys and two dogs around all day, it begged me to lay down and take it easy. Thankfully I have a short stack of good reads on my nightstand. It’s on occasions like this that you need a light, inspiring read. I finished up The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up and dozed off before 10pm (might be a record for this night owl).

The next morning I felt so much better.

In the end, although I finished nothing on my to do list, I consider this weekend a success. My husband got to be with his family when they needed him most (and thank God everything is okay). I didn’t blow a gasket taking care of two rowdy boys on my own for a couple of days. Instead my husband knew we were safe at home (even if the deck looks like crap, the office walls are blank, and my little guy is making do with toddler size bedding on a twin size mattress). There will be time for the to-do list another day.

I keep having to tell myself, “Never be hard on yourself for being a mom and wife first and letting everything else slide.”

Checking things off a list feels great, but so does a day without a list to follow. I threw out the list and focused on what my boys and I needed most.

How To Get Your Husband to Open Up About Decorating From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

My husband and I have fairly open discussions about decorating (whether he likes it or not…haha), but I am still shocked by how much goes unsaid.

I’ve always been guilty of asking surface questions like, “What do you think?” or “How does this look?” He usually answers with equally simple replies like, “Nice” or “Good.” When we only ask surface questions, we never get the full story.

So how do you get your husband to open up and share what he really thinks good or bad? I am going to share with you how I did it. I never knew it could be this easy to start a real conversation about decorating.

You might be thinking who cares…it’s better if my husband doesn’t have an opinion…I like that he lets me do whatever I want. But deep down I bet you’d like it even more if you both loved your home. You settle for indifference, because it’s better than rejection. But I know you secretly want him to want what you want. To be interested just a little. After all, it’s his house, too.

In any relationship, good communication comes down to finding common ground–a place you can both talk from openly and honestly. Not a one-sided conversation, but a discussion.

You know those great conversations you have after you see a good movie together, finish the same book, or reminisce about a family vacation? Those talks center around a common experience. You have a shared story and a common vocabulary to hold a conversation. Wouldn’t you like to have that kind of conversation about your home? A real discussion?

When I finished writing Free Decorating, I felt something was missing. After some reflection, I wrote a whole new chapter to add to the book and I think it’s one of the most important sections. It became more evident just how important it was when it opened up a frank discussion with my husband that I’ve been craving for years.

In Chapter Three The Eviction Notice, I share a simple but life-changing decision tree that helps you decide what decor to keep, what to get rid of, and what you should plan to replace. I wanted to create a really practical tool that anyone could use to evaluate their current belongings. It’s the same refinement process I’ve used (in my own head) for years to make sure we love everything in our home.

But I always did it solo. I assumed my husband would speak up if he really didn’t like something, and he has on occasion. But I also had this sinking feeling that he probably was letting some things slip by. That he wasn’t telling me everything he thought. That there was a real opinion behind those short one-word replies.

When I was developing the decision tree, I tested it out one night in our bedroom. I wanted to make sure it was strong and comprehensive. I wanted to make sure it would work for anyone. So I asked my husband to use it. I pointed to different items in the room, then had him follow the questions on the decision tree. Little did I know it would open a great dialogue about our decor and I would finally discover what my husband really thought about our bedroom.

In creating the decision tree, I had already run several of the items in our bedroom through the questions and come to my own conclusions. But I had also made most of the decorating decisions in the bedroom, so it wasn’t much of a surprise that pretty much everything came up a keeper for me. When my husband worked through the decision tree, he came up with some different results.

For example, I thought our bed was a total keeper. We bought it together, we’ve had it for maybe close to ten years now, and it’s from our favorite furniture store. I assumed all along my husband loved this bed too. Guess what? He only feels so-so about it. Obviously it’s useful, but after going through the decision tree, he revealed he doesn’t think it’s beautiful to him.

Now imagine if I didn’t like the bed, but had been working off the assumption that he loved it. We could have both been sleeping every night on a bed we both hated, assuming the other one liked it enough to keep it. That’s a real possibility when things go unsaid. One or both of you could be living with things you don’t love.

After our discussion we decided to keep our bed. It’s certainly useful and I think it’s beautiful. It’s not a priority at this point to replace it, but someday maybe we’ll find something we both find beautiful. Now I trust that we have a framework to have an honest discussion about how we feel before we buy the next bed.

There were a few other things that are leaving our room because of our conversation. The most notable was a piece of inexpensive art in the corner. It was nothing spectacular, but I enjoyed it. Turns out my husband hates it. When I asked why he’d said it was nice in the past, he replied, “I thought it might grow on me, but it’s not.” Even though I still like it, I didn’t want to keep it around knowing he doesn’t like it. It was easy for me to let it go knowing I’d rather find a piece for that spot that we’ll both enjoy.

You Just Need the Right Conversation Starter

The Keep It or Lose It Decision Tree and the entire Eviction Notice chapter gives you a simple way to start a discussion with your spouse about any item in your home. Instead of making assumptions, you can discuss what you like and don’t like about it and why. Instead of just accepting it when your husband doesn’t like something, you can refer him to the decision tree to help pinpoint why, so you can make a better selection next time.

With the decision tree you can uncover how he really feels about any item. Is it useful, but not so beautiful? Is it beautiful to one of you and not the other? Is something you assumed was meaningful to your spouse, not that important to them? Is there something else that is deeply meaningful that’s not being displayed?

The Keep It or Lose It Decision Tree is just one of the conversation starters in Free Decorating. My husband and I have also had great talks over The Pre-Purchase Test in Chapter Nine and Love vs. Appreciation in Chapter Two. They’ve given us the shared vocabulary to have meaningful decorating discussions and to hold each other accountable to create a home we both love.

Start a decorating discussion with your husband today.

P.S. The special launch price for Free Decorating ends tomorrow. The ebook is on sale for $2.99. You can also save $2 off the paperback version and get it for only $7.99 when your order here and use discount code: WRAL9T7E. The price goes up tomorrow, so grab your copy now.

Get “Free Decorating” (My Book!) Today From Jackie

Today's Inspiration comes from guest blogger Jackie Be sure to check out their blog!

My first book Free Decorating is available now. Grab the ebook for $2.99 this week only.

Why I Wrote Free Decorating

There was a time when I was ashamed of how much money I spent on home decorating. Not because I don’t believe in spending money on my home (I do), but because I quickly fell out of love with everything I bought. It felt so wasteful. I just couldn’t seem to get it right. Even the things I liked were pigeon-holed into one spot, because they didn’t work anywhere else.

I soon began to doubt myself. I was trapped in a home full of decor I only felt so-so about. I couldn’t wait to replace it all, but I had no idea how to find decor I loved.

When I left my corporate job and we became a one-income family, I had no choice but to reign in my home spending. But I still craved the joy of decorating. I learned that the quality of my decor was more important than the quantity. If I picked the right pieces upfront, I wouldn’t need to spend more to replace them later. If I chose pieces I loved, I could restyle and rearrange all my decor for a fresh look whenever I wanted. With the patience of my family through the many mistakes I made and all the money I spent on the wrong things I developed a set of guidelines that made choosing the right things for my home easy.

The lessons I learned and my personal decorating guidelines inspired Free Decorating.

It was so exciting to see the first print copy of “Free Decorating”.

When I set out to write this book, I struggled with doubt. I always imagined a decorating book had to be a coffee table tome full of to-die-for pictures. But I wasn’t interested in adding to the wealth of visual decorating inspiration. I wanted to write a book that would spark decorating action.

Free Decorating is a field guide. It’s meant to be useful. It’s filled with tips, guidelines, action steps, and online bonus worksheets to help you decorate for less and eventually for free. It’s designed to help you discover what you love, so you can decorate your home with confidence.

Here’s what others are saying:

Read more reviews on Amazon

Get your copy today!

Free Decorating is available now. The Kindle version is on sale for $2.99 this week only (the price goes up next Thursday). The Kindle ebook is available from Amazon in the following countries; US, Canada, United Kingdom, Australia, France, Spain, Denmark, Italy, Netherlands, Japan, Brazil, Mexico, and India.

You do not need a Kindle device to read the ebook. You can download the free reading apps from Amazon to read on any device.

Grab your eBook here.

The paperback version is available here. Use discount code WRAL9T7E to save $2.00 off the list price through Wednesday, May 27th.

Grab your paperback here.